Meeting & Disciplining the Emotional Kids

In a nutshell, "manage your emotions or they will manage you." Most of us do know that, but exactly how does one go about doing this? Well, since I'm a Clinical Hypnotherapist, we'll do this with specific designed imagery & imaginology that entertains the creative or subconscious mind. The creative mind loves to be entertained & we can provide plenty of that, certainly enough to manage the emotions & then some. In my new book, "How Many Cookies Will It Take to Make Me Happy", we come to understand not just our emotions, but their energy & how it can be released, then transmuted or changed to foster any goals we may have lined up.

If you are new to this blog/workshop then you might like to read the earlier mini-chapters. You can find them on FaceBook or on PublishersMarketPlace. Older postings can be found on http://beyonddisorderlyeating.blogspot.com/

It's time to return to the previous imagery. You have met up with many parts of you including your Therapeutic Self, your Unbalanced Self & your Higher Self. You know where to find your MindBody Health Garden & do understand about the underground root system that feeds the other Garden areas of your life including your relationship with yourSelf, your significant others, your work, spiritual life, home & future. You have come to accept that "you were born alone & will die alone" & that the time-line between those two points belongs to you & you alone. You are now much more aware of any issues with co-dependency & have unhooked many of those tendencies.

Your Unbalanced Self is grateful for your warmth & acceptance & is now ready to open some new growth areas for you. You are being invited to visit the path of this part of yourSelf & so let's go to where we're being led. After a short walk this part of you is indicating where the "playground" is located, right over there. You can see it ( or think it ) & it is much clearer now. Perhaps you can see the many children that are at play. Those are your "emotional kids". You met them briefly before, in the beginning of this workshop/blog. They basically fall into two groups; those that are helpful & those that are not helpful. You may also know them as positive & negative emotional states. Your observation tells you much more. Noticing that some are much bigger than others, you also can pick up the bullies, as well as the super-helpful ones, so you now understand that there are "degrees" of both positive & negative. Looking closer, the negative emotions tend to be a bit dirty & unkept. Their names are on their tee shirts which further helps in identifying who is who. The positive emotions tend to be cleaner & better groomed, as well as being better behaved.

Over there on the bench you can see their backpacks, one for each emotional kid. Your Unbalanced Self has permission to show us what's inside. Each backpack has a selection of DVD's. Some of these are old mind programs in the genres of negative or positive experiences. Besides the past experiences, the DVD's are filled with related thoughts & affirmations, each supporting the specific mind program. In addition to the old mind programs, you will find future-paced, or new mind programs, things that haven't happened yet. Again, some of these are in negative genres & other positive.

At this point you may wonder what these are for & why the emotional kids carry them around. It's really quite simple. You may not be aware, but you have a DVD slot in the middle of your forehead. The particular emotion that is in charge in any given moment, gets to place their specific DVD in that slot, thereby feeding your very own thought process. In this very moment, if you pay attention, you will find one or several of these programs playing for you. You didn't request them, but they are there nevertheless. And that's not all. Let me explain something about your personal DVD player. It acts like radar & is known as a servo-mechanism, attracting more of the same from your own subconscious mind library, as well as from the outside world. Now this would be fine if the DVD represented something that you want, but on most occasions it is involved in doing just the opposite.

Think about this for a moment. Your mind is busy, often super-busy, playing mind programs that are attracting experiences towards you, many of which you don't want. On the other hand, there are DVD programs that represent what you truly want & they may be sitting idle in the backpack of an emotional kid who is out of the loop.

It's now clear why your Unbalanced Self brought you here. You already know that this part of you cannot change things by itself. It needs you, the Balanced or Therapeutic Self to accomplish this. The Unbalanced Self knows that one of the reasons you are reading this book is because you have some issues with Disorderly Eating & if this is to be corrected in order to save the body systems from serious threat, then the emotional kids need to become disciplined.

But the playground isn't the best place to do this work. Your Therapeutic or Balanced Self is suggesting that we head for the schoolhouse, but before that, we're going to stop back at the MindBody Health Garden for some great nutrition.

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Copyright 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
May not be copied or reproduced without permission of the author.

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is the author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It, as well as over 350 Interactive Self-Hypnotic mp3/CD programs in the area of health, disease prevention, addictions, self-development & sports for adults & kids.

Meeting Your Unbalanced Self

Let me begin by saying that you are not your emotions, nor are you your unbalanced Self, but indeed, an unbalanced Self does exist in all of us. It's OK. You are not alone in this, no matter what others have told you. Here's the good news. The sooner you accept this part, the easier it will be to move towards balance. Notice that I didn't say "the sooner you will be in balance", because we are "emotionally fluid", moving back & forth between the two positions. As your awareness heightens, you will become more emotionally stable & be able to practice behaviors that will enhance your health & performance.

In my new book, "How Many Cookies Will It Take to Make Me Happy?", we are working inside imagery, practicing original Interactive Self-Hypnosis. The written word is similar to the spoken word & so here we are practicing "talking or reading hypnosis." There is nothing special you have to do, other than to read like you would any other book, allowing your own subconscious mind to form the images it chooses, already knowing that you are looking to make some important & perhaps life-saving Lifestyle Changes. This blog/workshop is an introduction to my book & if you are a new reader, you might like to catch up by reading some of the earlier posts. While you can read some of these on FaceBook or the PublishersMarketPlace site, you will find all of them at this link. http://beyonddisorderlyeating.blogspot.com/

The book is written as if the reader were in my office for hypnotherapy. In this instance, the focus is on Disorderly Eating, although the imagery & suggestions are applicable for all Lifestyle Change. You may wonder why this is & so let me explain. A healthy mind & body needs a balanced Self in charge. This balanced Self needs to provide high level nutrition, emotional & thought management, as well as positive-framed images to take the mind & body towards the desired goals. The body & mind know this as homeostasis. Again, this state is fluid. The balanced Self, staying in heightened awareness, observes what's going on inside the mind & body, making adjustments when needed. As the balanced Self becomes more practiced in maintaining homeostasis, the healthier the mind & body & certainly, the easier to reach the desired goals.

Being out of balance is synonymous with being "in stress." Stress can be internal or external. While it may be more difficult to manage external stress, an example being workplace or family stress, it is always possible to manage internal stress. Internal stress is how the body reacts or responds to external stress. All of this is within one's control & this is very good news because as I've already shared with you, 60-90 % of chronic diseases are caused or enhanced by internal stress.

Let's touch base with some huge internal stressors. What's interesting is that some of these stress-deliverers are actually employed as stress-releasers. These include smoking, alcohol & disorderly eating or poor delivery of nutrition. All of these are delivered by your Unbalanced Self & this is now the time to meet that part of you. In the theater of your mind, more commonly known as your thoughts or internal images, let's return to the MindBody Health Garden. You aleady have set images for this vital area. You can see or think the flower gardens that represent the many working systems of your body.

Notice that there is a path that comes from the back of the garden & now your Unbalanced Self is coming forward. Pay close attention, perhaps noticing some details about that part of you. If you like, make some written notes. I always suggest that my patients work with a journal that is specifically for Lifestyle Change & nothing else. This tells the subconscious mind that this work is very important & actually encourages the inner mind to assist with the rehabilitation. Now, as this part of yourSelf comes forward, welcome her or him. Perhaps in the past you didn't want to know this part of yourSelf, causing the Unbalanced Self to stay in hiding, guilty or ashamed of not being perfect. But that was the past & now is now. This is a part of you & a very important part. This part, like all parts, understands the problems & actually has the answers. You might wonder how this could be & if this is true, then why is the part Unbalanced. The truth is that something is missing here & that is the "leadership" of the balanced Self; the healthy Self that is in charge of taking care of your body systems. You do remember my sharing that with you when we were last in the MindBody Health Garden viewing the plants.

Let's work inside some rehabilitative imagery now. Take the Unbalanced Self gently by the arm & go over to the bench that is next to the Garden. As you do, notice that the Unbalanced Self is wearing leg braces, so that part is limping along, obviously needing your assistance. You might also notice that this part of you is child-like. It's very clear that this is not the Leadership you & so you feel compassion towards this Self. As you both sit down, go ahead & remove the leg braces. It's easy to do. You will find buckles on each brace. Just snap them open & the braces will fall away. Take a few moments & massage the legs of the Self, bringing back some healthy circulation while sharing your love for this part of yourSelf. Now help that part of you to stand up tall & to go forward with you.

There are several things that you will need from your Unbalanced Self & so this is the time to discuss these. First, you need to be aware when this part of you is present. Perhaps in the past you were on auto-pilot or sleep-walking in the unhealthy behaviors. Simply ask this Self to wake you to it's presence. Next, through the lense or frame of self-love, compassion & forgiveness, ask the Self to tell you what it needs in order to return to "balance." Find out what's missing in your Self-care. This part of you does know this & once you know, then you are in the position to swing the pedulum back to a balanced Self.

One more healing image.....notice the change in the body & mind system flowers when the Unbalaned Self transmutes or changes to the Balanced Self. If you could travel inside your body during this transformation, you would be able to observe the negative stress chemicals diminishing, while healing chemicals are being produced. This is the body returning to homeostasis.

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Copyright 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
May not be copied or reproduced without permission of the author

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is the author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It. She is also the writer/producer of over 350 mp3/CD programs for health, disease prevention, self-development & sports performance.

http://www.hypnosis-audio.com
http://www.sugar-addiction.com
http://www.international-medical-health-writers.com

Working the MindBody Health Garden

As we explore deeper into our issues with Disorderly Eating, we can locate the chapter in my new book, "How Many Cookies Will It Take to Make Me Happy?", where we find ourselves ready to enter the most important garden on the Goal-den or Therapeutic Path. This garden is not only important for those looking to lose weight. It's name tells the whole story... MindBody Health. It's the most important garden on the Path, for it contains flowers representing all body cells & their systems. In other words...Life.

Everything is connected. Remember my telling you that all gardens are fed by a powerful, underground root system?These roots feed your work & prosperity, your relationships including your relationship with yourSelf,your spirituality, even your future. Cheat in the MindBody Health Garden & feel the cheating in all areas of your life, not only now, but down your Future Path as well. Keep in mind that The Piper always has to be paid. No one gets away free.

If you've been following along, you know that we are working utilizing the power of specialized imagery that is so welcomed by your subconscious mind. This is a form of interactive self-hypnosis known as "speaking hypnosis." Here we are taking that one step further & practicing "reading hypnosis." Reading this blog or the book is just like reading any other book, only here the suggestions or word images are designed to evoke changes in your own Lifestyle Behaviors. You are currently on the journey to high level health & performance. So, it's not just about losing weight. It's much more than that. This journey can change the way you live & experience your Life.

It's time now. Rested & with Intention in hand, we enter the MindBody Health Garden over here. See the sign? Your name is also on the sign, because this is your garden & not anyone else's. Rememberabout self-ownership. Your garden is filled with flowers, one for each cell in your body. The array of flowers is staggering. Perhaps you didn't realize how many cells you have, each one of them needing care if they are to do their job. You are the only caregiver, for the cells cannot provide this to themselves.

The "cell flowers" are divided into sectors representing the systems of your body. You are familiar with some of these systems. Notice the signs that mark these; circulatory, neurological, endocrine, skeletal, muscular, digestive, immune, lymphatic, reproductive, respiratory, excretory & integumentary. These systems work separately, but also support each other; the stronger often supporting the weaker. The body always looks for balance or homeostasis. This is much easier to achieve when you, the caregiver, is involved with helping, but unfortunately, this is not always the case. Lots of times we simply don't pay attention. When's the last time you thought about any of your systems? When our body systems are working well we often take them for granted, but ask anyone who is having a system breakdown how they feel about this & you will hear a very different story.

As you might guess, there are many reasons for system breakdowns. A major reason is abuse & chronic ignoring by the chief caregiver. Sad, but true. 60-90% of chronic disease is linked to stress. That means that 60-90% of chronic disease could be erased by high level caregiving. Think about that for a moment. It's really quite astounding. Keep in mind that chronic diseases are built over a period of time. Look carefully at some of your systems here in the Garden. If you look closely you can see the stress on some sectors of the plants. Perhaps those wilted leaves in the heart or circulatory system are closely connected to your choice of food in the past few months. How about the digestive system? What might have caused those leaves to drop? Later on we'll be invited to visit your actual systems. From that perspective we can observe as you, the caregiver, actually deliver your level of care & formulate the body system outcomes. Then you will be able to evaluate where you might need to improve.

Since stress plays such a big part in the MindBody Health Garden, it's important to become more familiar with it. Remember, if you are going to take care of something, you need to be able to identify it & then make a plan. While stress is an over-used word, few people truly work to manage it in ways that make a difference to the body systems. In fact, they actually do just the opposite, delivering more toxins to the plants in the form of smoking, sugar, junk food, alcohol or other behaviors that encourage more stress chemicals to be produced by the body. And the stress-cycle continues to build on itself. More stress. More negative chemical interaction. The body systems begin to deteriorate, perhaps going towards the diagnoses of heart & circulatory disease, diabetes, chronic inflammatory diseases & even cancer. Remember that the mind & body are connected & so there is also immediate & long term deterioration of the mind functions. If this weren't enough, negative emotions are triggered, making daily life experiences more difficult to take. Of course, this stress-cycle also has a great impact on relationships, not only with others, but with the Self as well.

Earlier on we fell upon the explanation of the importance of being aware & bringing things to the light. This is what we are doing here. If we can't see something, we can't fix it & if we don't own it, then we tend to just put it down & ignore it. Perhaps in the past you called this by the name of "procrastination", maybe even laughed at it. If you listen, you'll hear others practicing this dangerous behavior, perhaps waiting to improve their eating & drinking behaviors for "some other time when there isn't so much stress." Should you over-hear anything like this, think about the body systems that belong to that individual. Think about what's going on in their MindBody Garden. Think about the outcomes they are building. Now, ask yourself if you have done the same. Have you laughed or made excuses in the face of your own body systems? Yes, it's time for apologizing & for seriously improving your caregiver status.

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Copyrighted 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
May not be copied or reproduced without permission of the author

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is the author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It. She has written & produced +350 mp3/CD programs in the area of health, prevention, self-development & sports performance for adults & children.

Freeing Yourself from Co-Dependency

This blog/workshop presents highlights from my new book, "How Many Cookies Will It Take to Make Me Happy?" If you are new to this area, scan down through the older posts to become aligned with what we're doing here. In the post below this one, you will find a link to an mp3 download for Goal Setting. This is a good introduction to your Life Path, also called your Goal-den Path. Here we are working with self-hypnotic images, or frames for creating Lifestyle Changes.

In the last blog/workshop entry I brought you to your Life Path. You've been introduced to your Therapeutic Self, emotional-state-kids, both positive & negative. Your over-arching Higher Power is filling your Path with light. The gardens are to your right & left. The biggest garden, on the right, is your MindBody Health Garden, the major garden of your Life Path. This garden contains plants for every cell in your body & it is in this garden that you work to meet all of the needs of your body. Keep in mind that all gardens are connected to each other by the underground root system. In other words, all gardens on the left hand side of the path, including your relationship with yourself, your significant others, your work, prosperity, home, spirituality & future are fed through the root systems that come from your MindBody Health Garden. This should, hopefully, underline it's importance, for make no mistake, if you don't take care of this garden, weeds will continue to grow in all other areas. Flip the coin & know that if you perform high level care to this garden, the plants in all other gardens will be highly nurtured, bringing forth gifts to you. This is not gobble-de-gook, but the way that the mind & body work together. It is pure science..

Many people, especially those with Disorderly Eating issues are co-dependent. That means that they are connected at the hip to others, often looking for direction, as well as approval from these hip-hangers. Not the way to be on the Goal-den Path; not the way to healing disorderly eating. In the past I was connected at the hip to my wonderful husband. I looked up to him, as a child would look up to a father-figure. He suggested that I jump & of course, I jumped. I loved him & still do, but I had to disconnect him from my hip. I had to be self-resourceful, independent & totally in charge of my Goal-den Path decisions. Yes, I could ask for advice or suggestions, but that is very different from allowing him to make my decisions for me. I also had to learn to say "no". I also had to learn to say "I'll think about it & let you know." If you are co-dependent, you may think that this is not possible with your particular hip-hangers, but it is not only possible, it is necessary.

I still work with some of my original images or self-hypnotic suggestions for managing this part of my Life Path. I see or "think" my path & gardens as being self-contained. In the distance I can see the beautiful stone walls that deliniate my life area. I pick up field glasses & look over the walls. I can find my husband's personal Life Path, as well as the one's belonging to my sons & also my Mother's. She is now deceased, but her Path is still present. In the past it was closer to mine, but I've been able to move it way back, almost to the horizon. This was an important move because I had a very co-dependent relationship with her throughout my entire life & in the first years that followed her death. The placement of the Life Paths of others, helps our creative subconscious mind to remember that we were born alone & die alone. We are in charge of our time-line between these two seminal points. In this aspect, there is no room for faltering.

I've had an eating disorder since childhood. As I've mentioned before, an eating disorder is multi-faceted & also has tangents. Those are particular paths that lead off of the disorder & infect other areas of life. When I was practicing co-dependency, I looked to my husband for all guidance. My child-emotions also looked to outsmart or fool him. For example, I'd wait for him to tell me that I was too fat, too thin, too this or that. Upon hearing his authority, I'm jump into action. Without that attention or direction, I'd continue to secretly binge, almost wanting to be caught before I killed myself. My child emotions would wake me up in the middle of the night, so I could binge in front of the television while he slept in the next room. I would even creep down the hall to check-in on his level of sleep, feeling empowered once I realized that "yippee, I was about to gobble down the rest of the ice cream."

When we have an eating disorder or practice disorderly eating behaviors, we can have all sorts of co-dependent relationships, including one with our Therapeutic or parent/teacher Self. That is why it is so important to build that inner-relationship on a daily basis. That is why we go to the Life Path & sit in the glow of our over-arching Higher Power. That is why we self-discipline our emotional states, both positive & negative. All of this is inner growth work & forms the backbone of our Life Path Experience & work.

You may think that this seems like a lot of trouble & if that thought has entered your mind, know that it was placed there by one of your negative-based emotional kids. The day that I realized that I had to change or I was going to have a very miserable walk down my Path towards my death, was the day that I was both very happy & very sad. Yes, letting go of unhealthy behaviors can be sad. These are like little deaths that need to be mourned. Here, we mourn & let go under our over-arching light.

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Copyright 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
May not be re-produced without permission of author

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is the author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It, along with over 350 original, interactive self-hypnosis programs. You can review these at http://www.hypnosis-audio.com or http://www.international-medical-health-writers.com

Looking Inside Clutter

"There are days when all we can see is clutter. Do know that those are good days, for we cannot change what we cannot see."... Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht

Related SpokenWords, Emotions & MindStates - confusion, ataxia, ballup, chaos, disarray, disorder, huddle, muddle, snarl, topsy-turviness, hash, hugger-mugger, jumble, jungle, litter, mash, mishmash, muddle, rummage, scramble, shuffle, tumble, hodgepodge, macédoine, medley, mélange; disarray, mess, muss, ruck

Even the related words for clutter tend to clutter ! Today I so wanted to write about dreams, but my own personal clutter won out. I even received several emails about clutter.........so clutter it is.

I truly shouldn't be writing this blog entry because my entire office is a mess. For the past week I've been working on a variety of projects, most of which required pulling my filing cabinets apart. As I searched for things I needed, I was struck by how disorganized my files had become. When did this happen? It seems to me that I had re-structured them not all that long ago.........or was it?

Once we begin to notice clutter it tends to turn up everywhere. I walked into my office closet & there it was........every shelf & drawer. Piles of things that I have little recollection of placing there. How is it that I can be with these piles every day, yet not see or remember anything about them?

I noticed that I was actually afraid to look around the rest of my life with my eyes of the day. What if I found this everywhere? Could I possibly be that lost in my life.......AGAIN?

My memories went back to the late 80's when I had a clutter-wake-up. We were living in the Albany, NY area & my husband was re-locating to Oklahoma & I was to stay to market the house & finish up some work projects. Our sons had just left for college & even the dog had run away. Yes....I was alone with myself, something that I preferred not to experience. During those years my bingeing issues were big & unresolved, usually waiting around any corner to take over my life.

To complicate matters, my husband suggested, quite strongly, that I clear out the house. I was stunned by this because to me, the house was just fine. It was clean. I was a good homemaker. We needed all the things that were there & I certainly wasn't about to get rid of the things I'd collected & loved.

I remember the cold & snowy night I returned from Oklahoma, feeling alone & frightened for some reason. As I waited for the house to warm up, I began thinking about what my husband had said. I decided to have a look in one cupboard in the kitchen to see if he could possibly be right. I couldn't believe what happened next. It was like I never, ever truly looked inside that cupboard, yet I was in & out of there at least a dozen times a day. I was especially stunned by the piles of margarine containers that were bent out of shape & yellowed. There must have been 50 or so.......

Why did I own these? I seemed to remember that I collected them for leftovers. Quite honestly, I don't like leftovers & certainly these were the most depressing containers I'd ever seen. I remember tearing... What had happened to me? How widespread was this pattern of disorganization & not-remembering? I opened a few kitchen drawers & realized that they contained things that I didn't even recognize. I had no idea what to do with some of the gadgets that lived there. I began to feel surrealistic, like I was a visitor in my own life. Since I was working in gerontology with Alzheimer's patients at the time, I began fantasizing about perhaps being in the early stages. Not very funny. For some reason my bingeing came to mind.........yes, it was like my entire life & home were on some sort of bender.

By this time I knew I was on to something, intuition perhaps & I had a slight twinge of awareness that this was going to be a very important something. My inner mind suggested that I make some spot visits to other rooms..........no matter where I went, the same was waiting for me. My goodness. Think further.....And if this was the case with my home, what about the other parts of my life? I thought about my work, my hobbies, my goals & my dreams....my relationships. Were they also full of clutter & detachment? What couldn't I see? What was I missing?

Of course, this idea added to my earlier uneasy feelings about being alone & being afraid of myself, but sometimes when fear mounts, it does reach it's peak & thank goodness, that is what happened for me. I reached the top of the fear- mountain & now I could sense the release. I was willing to see & so now I was free to take care of things.

How does one begin when there is so much clutter, confusion & disorganization? Here are some things I did. They may sound a bit excessive, but I needed a plan to set me free.

1. I rented a copy of Ghandi. I knew that he had gotten down to one loin cloth & his glasses. I thought he would be a good mentor for me. I watched it twice !

2. I decided to set up 3 categories to help me evaluate my possessions & those I had ownership over. These included garbage, things I didn't really need or had too much of & had to go & then, group 3....things I needed or truly loved. The last was a tricky category because the binge part of me could say this about anything. For this reason I set up a temporary area in the garage. I could place things there & after a week I could re-evaluate. There is something positive about getting things out of the house. This is the beginning of releasing......

3. I made a folder for each room & listed every area separately, including each drawer, closet, shelf, etc. When I began a room, I had to stay with it until it was finished. Of course, some rooms took me a week or so. The basement took me several weeks. What I mean by staying with it was that I didn't allow myself to do a drawer in the kitchen & then one in the bedroom. I noticed the tremendous desire to do this........it seemed far too related to my troublesome behaviors of the past & so it was disallowed.

4. I made myself actually touch or handle everything I owned. Then I decided it's category. And yes, this was very time-consuming, but as I look back, it was a very important rule. I learned much from this exercise & it translated into changed behaviors that follow me to this day. Rarely do I purchase things I don't really love or need. I used to buy more compulsively & so this was a tremendous benefit for me. I learned to appreciate what I had & of course, realized that I had far too much. I didn't need all of these things to live happily. In fact, they had gotten in my way.

5. I allowed myself one job & two hobbies. One hobbie had to be a physical activity & the other one could be whatever I wanted. The reason for this rule for me was that I had tons of hobbies. I started things, but didn't finish them. I'm a person who is interested in just about everything. I love to knit, sew, embroider, do needlepoint, do beadwork, do crafts, etc., etc. As for work, I had several jobs going, yet I wasn't truly doing what I wanted to do. I came to realize that unless I stopped this binge behavior, I would never come to do what I really wanted to do. In other words, I was pushing my subconscious mind to focus hard. My mind had gotten lazy through the years & so my goals had wandered away.

6. I rewarded myself each day with something non-tangible. I had forgotten how to do this & so for me this was another adventure in getting to know myself better.

It took me about 3 months to complete this task. It was truly a journey to find myself & to get to know myself, perhaps for the very first time in my adulthood. I did end up reviewing my relationships & actually ended a few friendships that truly weren't. I shortened my Christmas card list..... & enhanced my most important relationships.

So, how long did this last? Well, at the beginning of this blog I mentioned that I was surrounded by clutter. Obviously, this is an ongoing process, but it is very rewarding. I do the house thing every year or so........or when it speaks to me. Once you have done the big process, more frequent messages are received.

If you are motivated to do this, don't be surprised if you get some big releases & creative break-throughs ! I'm expecting one once I clear out this closet!


"The true & creative me is located under that pile of clutter. As I come out of hiding & direct my attention to my clutter, I come directly in contact with my true self." ...Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht

Questions & Answers from Readers

WORKING WITH IMAGES - READING VS DOING

Our brains work in different ways. In fact, we have at least 7 types of intelligences. Some of us can image along with reading, while others cannot. Sometimes we sense this difficulty as "distracting" or "uncomfortable." I also have this issue, but have worked to improve this part of my intelligence. I used to notice it when reading or studying sewing patterns, or figuring out how to work the DVD, especially hooking it up & programming it. I promise you that the images I'll be presenting here will be nothing like those!!

So, how do we get past this "distraction." I suggest that you read through the image exercise first. That will put the compulsive part of you at rest. Yes, we all have compulsive parts of our personalities & they are especially present in those of us with disorderly eating or sugar addiction, the reason being both physiological & emotional/behavioral. We have lots of nasty patterns to break.Next, relax deeply in your chair. I've given instructions for that. If necessary, break those instructions into steps; read them one by one or write them down in a numbered list. That will help the mind to "organize" or settle down. Disorderly eaters often have problems with rapid thought disorder or what I call "runaway brain syndrome."

1. Sit up in the chair with your finger tips on your lower abdomen.

2. Invite or feel your breath in this area. Just think it there. The abdomen goes up & down. Remember how a dog breathes when resting. Your mind will do the rest.

3. If & when your mind wanders, bring it back to the breath.

4. Your mind may try to push you around, but you are in charge.

5. Stay with the breath.

6. Feel the chair pulling you down gently, just as if magnets were there.

7. Feel the chair pulling you back gently, just as if magnets were there.

8. Just with your imagination, draw or imagine that a golden egg shape is around you & you are inside of it. Your mind may wander & that is fine. Bring it back to the egg.

9. Feel your fingers moving on your lower abdomen.

10. Practice enjoying the sensation.That is a very simple, but very important exercise.

What you are doing is taking some control over your mind & body. You are slowing your brain waves & body functions, bringing it back to healthy balance. I suggest that you practice this at least 6 times a day, just for a few minutes. This practice is called "fractionation" & is rather like taking out the trash more frequently. We all need this.

FEAR OF RELAXING

If you are not used to relaxing deeply, then the sensation will be new to you. There is no reason to be afraid to relax deeply. Why would there be? The body & mind WANT & NEED this. If you would like to control the depth of the relaxation, pretend that you have an imaginary dial. When you turn it to the left the body relaxes more; to the right, body tension returns. Practice turning the dial in both ways.

WANTING TO GET RID OF MY WEIGHT RIGHT NOW & DON'T WANT TO DO IT THIS WAY

Oh...well unfortunately that's not the way it works. People with disorderly eating issues are usually looking for a miracle or quick fix. Eating issues are not just about food & that is why diet books or programs don't work on their own. People need to go into "recovery" to become aware of the many facets of the addiction or disorderly eating behaviors. They are different for everyone & only by working closely with the mind & body, will it be possible to climb out of the rut & stay out.

We haven't addressed emotions yet, but I did give an exercise for working inside the "rut." This is a key exercise, because only by bringing "light" to the issues or emotions, can one dilute or escape them. Look at your life as a "theatrical production." The rut is a scene....actually a very important scene that has become the focal point for disorderly eating. For some of us, it is a complicated & dark area. Mine was like that & I'm still cleaning & clearing it out. Recovery takes time & it takes work. In the beginning, emotions may try to stop or block the recovery work. Keep in mind that you are not your emotions. For now, image them as little children, wearing tee shirts with their names on the front. Some are negative & others positive. Negative ones hang out in the "rut" & don't want their environment to change. But, you are in charge now. When you came out of the "rut" I gave you my power through another image. Keep the questions coming....this is what recovering is all about.

MP3

The complimentary mp3 program that I have posted on my websites is called Affirmations for Making Changes. You can download the first track or self-hypnosis session there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It. Now available in EBOOK with or without 3 mp3 programs.

Meeting Your Therapeutic Self & Inner Family

My new book, "How Many Cookies Will It Take to Make Me Happy?" follows the therapy model I designed for myself & then integrated into both my private practice patient care, including the design production of my CD/mp3 programs.

Whether working with Disorderly Eating or any other life issue, first we must uncover the negative behavioral habits, including all of their facets & tangents. Next, we must treat them therapeutically. This is accomplished through the development of a very strong "Therapeutic Self" who will work inside a "frame" or specialized imagery for organizing particular projects.This is the part of yourSelf that is the adult/parent/teacher...a mature Self that is directly connected to your Higher Self.

LET'S MEET UP WITH YOUR THERAPEUTIC SELF

I'd like you to read through my suggestions & then go back & read them again, but this time work within the images I'm going to give you. We always begin by relaxing deeply into the moment. This is simple to do. Just take a deep cleansing breath, rather like a yawn breath. Make yourself comfortable. You may think that you are already comfortable, but once you "intend" to become very comfortable you will sense the difference. To your right is your Therapeutic Self. As I already mentioned, this is the adult/parent/teacher, mature part of you that is directly connected to your Higher Self. Notice this part of you now. You might actually design an image that you can see in the theater of your mind, or you can just "think" this Self; whatever you choose. Let's infuse this Self with some positive emotional qualities, such as patient, gentle, kind, confident & respectful of who you are, for indeed, you are one & the same.

Let's talk about who you are, as well as who you are not. This concept will help you to begin to understand how your Self is divided & how you will be working with the frame-image of the "Therapeutic Pathway". In short, you are the writer, director & producer of your life. Read that last sentence again. It's meaning is much more than a group of words. It is an Affirmation of self-ownership & self-responsibility.

What do I mean by this? First, you were born alone & will die alone. The life that occurs between those two points belongs to you. What you choose to do with it, is up to you & no one else; not your mother, father, sister, brother, husband, wife, children, boss....you get the idea. All of these people, no matter whether you love them or hate them, have no ownership over your life. This does not mean that you don't have responsibilities to your relationships, for indeed you do. It simply means that your life is yours & that you are responsible for your choices. This concept is extremely important because without it, you give away your power. In no shape or form, are you possessed or owned by others. When this happens it is difficult to say "no." You can get stuck in the "pleasing" scenario. You can become fearful, often allowing others to manipulate you, as if you were a puppet on a string. When you are with or in your Therapeutic Self, this is not possible. You are focused, wise, quietly attentive & assertive. You are in full ownership of your Self & what is yours.....your Therapeutic Pathway, also known as your life. Remember? The space between your birth & your death.

Yes, you own your "Therapeutic Pathway." This is where you live your life, staying inside your "Mature Therapeutic Self" as much as possible. Remember, that's your adult/parent/teacher Self that is connected to your Higher Self or the Universal Mind. You may wonder where you go when you are not with or in your "Therapeutic Self." Well, you are with or in your other Self or emotional child-Self. That part is always in process; always learning & growing. Keep in mind that we learn from both positive & negative emotional states, as well as the behaviors or habits that accompany them. Our thought processes are internal communications from all of our parts....Therapeutic Self, negative emotional child-selves & positive parts. In the future, as you learn to tune into your thoughts in new ways, you will be able to identify each part.

So now you have a family portrait of sorts. Image or think it. There you are with your Therapeutic Self & a group of emotional child-selves, some negative & others positive. I'd like you to better define them by giving them tee shirts with their names embossed on the front. For this imagery exercise, let's take the ones that are involved with eating practices & place them in their own sub-group. Have them stand over there. . In addtion, on their shirts you will recognize their particular eating facet or tangent. There are those related to food choices, shopping, bingeing, restaurant eating, etc. Notice that there are both negative & positive members of the group. You may be surprised to know this, but it is true. You actually do well in some areas & it's important to acknowledge this. As you learn to carefully identify your helpful emotions, you will be able to enhance their power, making them bigge, so they can work to assist you in other areas where you may not be as skillful. For example, if you do well in meal planning, but not so well in restaurant eating, you can bring your positive meal planning emotions into the restaurant eating arena.

There is another aspect to your "inner family." Tilt your eyes up slightly. I'd like you to image your Higher Self or Higher Power. This is not a religious exercise, but a spiritual one. No matter what your beliefs, do know that we all have a connection to something higher, be in a Higher Self or a Higher Power. Notice that this part is "over-arching" the portrait, perhaps shining light down on it. Go further into the image by sensing the light. Perhaps notice its brightness, the rays, the gentle heat or love that it provides. This completes your first healing image for working within your Self.

VISITING THE THERAPEUTIC OR GOAL-DEN PATH

It's time to design another very important mind-image, that of the Therapeutic or Goal-den Path. You will be utilizing & growing this image over & over again, so take your time as you put the ideas together. Let's begin by going back to the concept of the space between your life & death. This is your Path. You've been on it since your birth, but most likely never imaged it in this way. Just as if you had a drawing pad in front of you, draw a path & paint in golden bricks. I like to switch the images of golden & goal-den. The subconscious mind likes games such as this & we want to pleasure the mind in positive ways. Let's continue with the mind drawing. Go ahead & place a large garden on the right hand side of the path & several smaller gardens on the left. The major garden on the right is called the "mindbody health garden" & it contains plants representing all of your body parts. The smaller gardens on the left represent your relationship with yourSelf, other significant relationships such as your husband, wife, children, your work/prosperity, home, spiritual & future areas. We'll be working with all of these later on.

Remember....this is your Path & while others can be invited here, they come only as guests & only to work in your behalf. In the next blog, we'll enter the major mindbody health garden & set it up for high level nutrition & behaviors.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Copyrighted 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
May not be reproduced without permission of the author.

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is the author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It. She is President & Program Designer, Sarasota Medical & Sports Hypnosis Institute & International Medical Health Writers, Ltd.

The Healing Zone

There are 4 basic steps or active images for Managing Disorderly Eating. Active means that you will be participating "inside" the images. Here we will be building a working or Healing Zone for recovery. In the future, I'll give you additional imagery to add to the basic steps. As your portfolio of imagery grows, your subconscious mind will become more "in love" with your personal recovery & you will begin to notice how it encourages you in new, positive directions.


When dealing with addiction or imbalance of any sort, the mind can benefit from having special structure & this is what these images will provide. And while they give stability, they are fluid & will change throughout your work. I've been working with my Healing Zone for over two decades & while I can easily recognize them in the theater of my mind, once I enter them I'm continually amazed at how my subconscious mind has added to them over the years. It's like having a personal inner coach who is constantly present.


Here are the 4 areas we'll be establishing. Think of them as separate buildings on a particular street. My Healing Center is in a private park, filled with mature trees & lots of flowers. There is a brick paved road & a stone walking path that leads between the buildings. For me, the stone path symbolizes stepping stones & the child part of me loves to skip over them. I share this with you so you can begin to enjoy the beauty of managing your life issues with Interactive Imagery. Keep in mind that your subconscious mind is a "creative child-mind" & becomes very impressed with this type of playful imagery, that is saturated with emotions of joy & pleasure. Then, it will do everything to make it come true for you. Let me mention here that the mind works backwards; once it senses the desired outcome, it will provide the go forward plan to bring it to fruition.


OK...let me take you inside the Healing Zone imagery:


1. Restaurant
2. Bank
3. Exercise Center
4. Film Studio


RESTAURANT


Obviously, eating the right foods, in the right amounts & at the right time are paramount to recovery from disorderly eating, as well as any addiction or body-mind imbalance. The image of a restaurant works well for me & many of my patients like this as well. Let me take you through my imagery. Then you can decide if you would like to work with something like this, or choose something else.


As we enter the building, we find ourselves in the lobby where a large painting of myself is hanging on the wall. I'm holding a child, who is also mySelf. This is very metaphoric, indicating that as I care for mySelf, I care for the child within. If I touch my hand in the painting, the image of mySelf awakens & will step down to greet me. Having a positive, loving & respectful relationship with yourSelf is paramount to recovery, as well as building self-esteem. I pay attention to the details of mySelf; of course they are all positive & glowing.


We enter the restaurant & I'm aware that this is a "restaurant of the world." It is filled with people from all over the world; people who are eating wonderful, healthy food. In other words, we are all on the same page. The world is filled with people who are practicing high level health. It is powerful for me to know this because in the life that I observe out of imagery, it is not like this. Yes, I do need a new model & this is perfect. My lonliness subsides.


Because it is a restaurant of the world, it is divided into sectors; breakfast, lunch, dinner & snacks. As I walk around with my painting Self, I notice the healthy foods & amounts that are being enjoyed for all meals. I like to take my time here because in the past, my choices were often narrow & uninteresting. Now this is just the opposite.While I'm viewing these inner images, my subconscious mind is fast at work, making plans & suggestions for what I need to change. These will pop into my mind at a later time as positive suggestions, motivated by a high desire to move out of my rut.


I often stop & chat with the different "visitors" in the restaurant. I ask them direct questions & always get answers. This is another view of the subconscious mind at work. Sometimes I taste things. Involving the senses is a great way to explode your innate creativity. I'm often invited to sit down & join in the conversations. As I become more involved with the socialization & joy of participating in healthy mealtimes, my own mind is once again looking to revamp my old patterns.


I like to visit the chefs from around the world & observe them prepare wonderful recipes that are easy & delicious. In my out of imagery life, I'm often not keen on cooking, having tired of the process many years ago. This negative emotional marinade made it difficult for me to get healthy & so this type of imagery is very powerful in the area of changes that are important to me.


On another occasion I'll take you outside the restaurant to the gardens that include all the body part plants that benefit directly from the restaurant. This area serves as a very important motivator, indicating what happens to our body & mind when we don't provide what is needed.In the next installment, we'll leave the restaurant & walk over to the Bank. There we will utilize imagery for managing thoughts & emotions, thereby building our assets.

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Copyrighted 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
May not be reproduced without permission of the author.


Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is the author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It

A Peek Inside the World of Secret Eating

In my upcoming book, "How Many Cookies Will It Take to Make Me Happy?", we enter the important area of "secret eating behaviors", for in order to recover& to successfully lose weight, if that's the goal, it will be important to move outside of any secrets, coming to know them as "things" & not a description of who you are.

All disorderly eaters keep secrets. I started my secret-eating library when I just a little girl, probably around the age of five. I can remember eating cookies in my closet, far away from my critical mother, who I actually loved dearly. In fact, I loved her so much that I didn't want her to be angry with me, so I hid. That closet became the secret-activity center for reading books of my choice & knitting peacefully, without her grabbing it from my hands to correct my mistakes.

Living in the land of secrets means moving away from one's healthy, balanced path where the maintenance & building healthy self-image, esteem, confidence & even prosperity exists. Secrets live in a different sector of the mind, having special needs & often complicated care & attention. For example, secrets, both big & small, must be continually protected & have special demands. Picture an emotionally imbalanced, spoiled child & you have an fairly accurate image of a secret. As one works to protect or hide the secret, barriers to the outside or non-secret world are constructed. These barriers serve to isolate the Self, marrying it to the secret, while building tension effecting both the mind & body. Over time, these barriers or isolation chambers become stronger, giving the secret even more power. In case you haven't guessed, this is a very stressful way to live life.

I've been an expert secret-keeper, especially in my disorderly eating life, but this has also made me a better therapist, so I could say that my secrets have gifted me. Even though you're probably not a professional therapist, you are a Self-therapist & your very own secrets can gift you as well. It's good to know that it's not all that complicated to disassemble them. All it takes is a hot desire to be honest. As you identify or name the secrets, the barriers will fall, freeing you to live a healthy & creative life.

Right now you might feel a bit uneasy about what I'm suggesting, but that is normal. You want to let go, but at the same time it is frightening. This is because we're so used to being judged by others & especially by ourselves. These inner thoughts are called the VOJ, or voice of judgment. When others criticize, the inner VOJ announces, "I told you so." And so, we believe it & enhance the barrier that hides the secrets. This is the vicious cyle. Now, you are going to identify them & bring them to the light. Remember, the secrets are outside of you. Secrets are "things" that you have in your possession & you are not the secrets. You are simply you.

Let me just touch base for a moment in the area of the VOJ. Once again, the VOJ is a "thing" & is outside of you. Criticism from someone else is also a "thing." You can either accept it or not. Imagine someone handing you a box. You can accept it or not. Although this is a somewhat simplistic image, it will work, especially if the criticism isn't too toxic. If it is, you will want to utilize some self-hypnotic techniques for taking it down a few levels. We'll address this a bit later. For now, decide that all VOJ chatter is simply a bunch of boxes or things.

Let's work to identify some behaviors that may fall into the secret category. I'd like you to work on awareness or noticing these. This is the first step in letting to of them. Remember, if they are hidden away, they can't be released. In the practice of Disorderly Eating we can have many secrets, some more toxic than others, but all toxic nevertheless. Let me share some examples. You may recognize these in yourself or have seen them in others. In an earlier blog I shared my secrets regarding the cookies & car eating. Bingeing in cars while parked or driving is a familiar secret, especially when alone. Sometimes others are present, but these are usually enablers. You can tell the difference by answering the question, "Would I be comfortable eating like this in front of a stranger?" I have a friend who works the drive-through window of a fast food restaurant. She can tell from the order & number of people in the car who is about to have a car-eating binge. If you have the opportunity to look inside someone's car or especially under the seat, you will sense the secret.

Here are some other ways that disorderly eaters hide secrets. Some hide food in their homes, often making up elaborate stories to justify having particular foods in the house. Enablers don't require this explanation, so if you are wondering about a behavior of your own, ask the above question. "Would I be comfortable demonstrating this in front of a stranger?" Just a short comment about enablers. They may be supportive, but they can also be highly critical, making them difficult to understand. This incongruent behavior often leads to more secretive behaviors, as one tries to escape the painful truths.

I have a patient who keeps sugar foods under her bed "because ( she ) is hypoglycemic & may need it in the night." Middle of the night eating is often another secret. Eating in the dark or in front of late night TV is a release mechanism I know well. I would even wake up out of a deep sleep to have this "special reward" time. Another place for secret eating is in the movie theater. The next time you're there, look to the seats next to the wall. Secret eaters tend to like those away areas, because secret eating is about being invisible.

Even if you are a secret eater, you may be highly critical of those who do this. This is part of denial. We know this from studying alcoholics. It's very hard to admit the truth. The same here. We all hide behind masks of what we are willing to allow others to see & is very different from what plays inside our mind. For example, I was a highly successful medical professional, wife, mother, daughter & friend. However, my inside Self considered me to be an imposter. I remember thinking, "If anyone truly knew who I was & what kinds of things I did, they would abandon me." I was living inauthentically in this area of my life & it's very existence was having toxic effects on other areas, disallowing me to enjoy being mySelf.

In the next blog entry, I'll be giving you some specific exercises for working with the identification process.

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Copyrighted 2009 - Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It. The title of her upcoming book is "How Many Cookies Will It Take to Make Me Happy?"

How Many Cookies will it take to Make Me Happy?

This is another excerpt from my soon to be published book of the same name.

I truly believe that we learn from the stories of others. This is especially true in "Disorderly Eating" or food addiction issues, because so much of it is "secret eating", tightly tied & woven with threads of shame & guilt. As an RN, Clinical Medical Hypnotherapist & disorderly eater, I find myself in the perfect position to tell my truths for the purpose of undressing the problems, while shining the therapeutic light, smack dab in the middle, where healing takes place. My personal & professional experience has taught me that if secrets stay behind closed doors, they cannot be healed. This is one of the biggest reasons why it is so difficult to solve eating issues.

I believe in healing addictions with detachment & humor. Today it's all about cookies & how many cookies it will take to get the child-mind to stop demanding them. Of course, it doesn't have to be cookies; it could be anything that you continually or obsessively think about. Since I've been a disorderly eater for decades, I've been through the gambit; pizza, diet coke, greasy chips, M&M's, chocolate peanut butter ice cream, even strong coffee. Yes, addiction & food obsession has many coats & like with other addictions, manage one & the next one steps up to the plate, in this case, literally. Yes, we would like our eating issues to disappear completely, but it's best to know the truth. Most of them have been harbored from early childhood & are very heavily etched, making it difficult to snuff them out completely. But don't be disheartened. I'm here to tell you that you can learn to play this particular behavioral game well & each time you manage your child-mind, you will become stronger, not only in the area of food, but in others as well. Your self-image, self-esteem & personal power will be built with each & every successful challenge....just like building muscle.

Now, about those cookies. For me, there are cookie-issues, but this particular cookie issue went far beyond the cookie jar. In fact, there was no cookie jar involved. This involved those soft cookies sold in the local supermarkets, to be exact, one chocolate, one chocolate chip & one sugar cookie placed in a bag, not a box. Boxes don't hide well & secrecy was part of the very specific rules & regulations for this binge activity. The cookies were to be purchased on the way home from work, eaten in the car, finished by the time I turned into the subdivision, where I would dutifully stop the car, step out, brush off the crumbs & check my lipstick. I remember one day when my heart raced as a neighbor's car stopped to ask me if I was having a problem. "No problem ...thought there was a wasp in the car." Now lying was added to guilt & shame. I must admit there was a part of me that felt smart & clever as the story was told to the unsuspecting, now deemed ridiculous, nosey neighbor.

Then there came a day when I knew this activity had to stop. I can't remember exactly why; perhaps the angels were trying to save my life again. I loved them & hated them at the same time. As I came to understand more about my internal structure, I could notice my adult/teacher self & then the sassy, child-self who could get out of control on a dime. This day my adult/teacher said "enough." And so, I passed the supermarket with the child-self trying to grab the steering wheel, so I could turn into the parking lot. "Wow...one dangerous child-self!", I thought to myself. She was truly beyond what I had experienced in the past & I remember wondering how far she'd go with me. I've had experiences in the past where I've been afraid of myself, but never with eating or bingeing issues. Just then I remembered I had to pass two other supermarkets. Thinking I had stalled the little beast, I began to relax. "Not so fast", came the violent jolt to my body. "It's not too late. You can still consume them in time." The car actually lurched to the turning lane as if I was possessed or something.

As I pulled the car back, I heard the threats. "I'm make you throw up. You can't stop me. I say what you eat & when you eat it." Now, perhaps you think I'm making this up, but make no mistake. The addictive child-self is without conscience & when she/he senses weakness in the adult/teacher, that is when sparks can fly & in this instance, they were big & they were flying. If she could have pinned me to the wall, she would have done just that. Fortunately, my angel was on my shoulder waking me up. The traffic light turned red & in stillness, I contemplated what had just happened. As I looked to the passenger seat, I could see "her."; about eight years old, pig-tails & a turned down lower lip. "Oh my God, she's really real!! An absolutely dangerous brat & I'm responsible for "her."

For some reason, I remember taking a deep, long meditative breath. This must have been silent angel instructions. Then, I heard my voice; not my usual spitting angry Mother voice that I learned from my own childhood. This was a gentle, but firm, assertive voice that I'd not heard ever before. The red light changed to green & we moved forward. "So tell me. How many cookies is it going to take for you to leave me alone & to never, ever do that again?" Her reply was quiet, but arrogant. "Oh, zillions & gillions." There it was. There would never be enough. Even if I were on my deathbed, she would still be there, in charge & demanding.

The new voice responded, "Well then, that's why you will never, ever have another one of those." Quiet, assertive & very sure. Now, I don't believe in exorcism, but in that moment I felt her presence shift way back into the corner of the car & out of the corner of my eye I noticed she was looking out the window in a relaxed-state. Perhaps she was missing her Mother/Teacher...

Post-script - from that day on there was never, ever a demand or desire for one of those cookies.

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Copyright 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
May not be copied or reproduced without permission of author.

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is the author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It.

The Hunger & Fatigue Zone

I grew up super-hungry. As a child, I remember being criticized for always eating. Yes, I was truly hungry, both physiologically & emotionally. My body & mind thought about eating most of the time. As the years passed, other physical changes became evident, such as a tendency to store belly fat & to feel "drunk" after eating. However, no matter how much I ate, the insatiable hunger continued & my life evolved around it. While being athletic probably saved me from becoming obese, no one seemed to know that my hunger levels were announcing a problem, nor that my eating behaviors were setting the stage for some serious medical & emotional problems down the road.


It took decades for me to fully understand what my body & mind were trying to tell me. Despite being an RN, the kind of information I needed was simply not readily available. Yes, there was plenty of "diet" jargon around & I kept believing that very soon I'd find the secret. Instead, these diets turned me into a yo-yo compulsive eater & diet junkie. I was blind to the fact that I was making myself even more seriously ill.


My "I could eat the wallpaper off the walls" hunger & fatigue were early indicators of pre-diabetes & closely related to other killer diseases including heart & circulatory disease, a medical syndrome known as hyperinsulinemia. In simple terms, my pancreas was over-producing insulin while building what's called insulin resistance on my cell borders. As my pancreas tired, I was on the fast road to adult onset diabetes. The new-found knowledge told me that this was no longer about wanting to lose weight, but about choosing whether to live & or die. Simple & scary as that.


Through the years I had literally dug myself into a hole & the only way out was to change my lifestyle behaviors radically....at least for me. I had come to understand that I was a very disorderly & undisciplined eater. I ate what I wanted, when I wanted. There was little rhyme or reason to what I did. I paid little attention to the messages from my body or mind. I never considered my body organs when choosing what or when to eat. It was only about personal satisfaction. I lied & made excuses, so I could keep doing whatever I wanted. I ate secretly. I binged in the car on the way home from work. I binged in the middle of the night. If I finished off a pint of ice cream, the next day a new one would magically appear. If it felt good, or if I believed it would release my stress, I did it, secretly knowing that one day it would catch up with me, but....not today. I was wrong.


One day I realized that I would have to change everything regarding my eating & exercise behaviors. I was so happy to find out what was wrong with me, but this was also the day I met up with the destructive, addictive child-part of my personality; the part that ranted & raved to keep things the same as they were, diabetes threat or not. It was very chilling to experience my own potential to destroy myself by choice. I never want to forget that, as it's only by knowing that part that I can stay in good health.


Well, this is a blog & not a book. Let me give you some nutshells of knowledge that I hope will help you to awaken & move off of the killer path & onto the path of recovery & health:


ABOUT HUNGER & FATIGUE: Moderate hunger means it is time to eat. Excessive hunger means that your body hasn't received sufficient food, or the wrong kinds of food or that you've skipped meals. In other words, you are not taking care of your body & mind & this is your responsibility. As for fatigue, if your physician has examined you & finds no other cause, your fatigue is most likely related to your poor eating habits & should correct itself as soon as you settle in.


WHAT TO EAT: The body needs a balance of protein, carbohydrates & healthy fats. While there are formulas for this, quite honestly I think it's easier to just think in food groups. Protein should be lean. Fish is friendly. Cut back on red meat. As for fats, develop a relationship with olive oil. A little goes a long way. Dairy is both protein & carbohydrate. It may like you or it may not. Treat it with a level of caution because it is lactose or sugar. Sugar is not friendly. Carbohydrates should be low-glycemic, legumes or whole grains. If you don't like vegetables, learn to like them. They can save your life. Fruits are carbohydrates, but need to be monitored depending on your family & personal medical history & the level of hyperinsulinemia you are experiencing. All fruits are not created equal. Bananas are not blueberries & the body responds differently to them. Get smart here. Refined carbohydrates are not your friends & will keep you on the path of hunger, fatigue & moving towards illness. As your body recovers, you may be able to re-introduce some of these, but this will take time. Soda or pop is bad for you. If you must sparkle, try seltzer. Juice or juice-like drinks need to leave. Alcohol will probably have to leave for awhile. Once again, all of this is your responsibility. Learn to accept so you may learn to live.


WHEN TO EAT & HOW MUCH: It's important to have a food discipline. Eating every 3.5 to 4 hours is necessary to provide what the body needs. The body is like a car & needs proper fuel. If you don't feed it, it will break down, both now & later. The body isn't interested that you are too busy or don't like to cook or believe that you can't cook. The body will do what it needs to do. The amount of food you need is determined by your lean body mass & your level of activity. When the scale weight is too high, this usually means that the lean body mass is too small & the body fat percentage is too high. This is backwards. The lean body mass needs to be bigger that the body fat percentage. You reverse this by eating properly & exercising. If you don't eat sufficiently or in a timely manner, the body will store fat. That's the way it works. If you need help figuring this out, there are websites that will help you. If you think this is too much trouble, then you are in trouble.


WHAT ABOUT CAKES, COOKIES, ICE CREAM, ETC. They live somewhere else, but not where you live. In the future, you may be able to entertain them, but for now, they are not part of the recovery. If you think this is not possible, then you are going to pay the piper dearly. Stop fighting so much. This only makes things worse. Pretend they are poison, which they are for you. Utilize whatever image works best. Practice quiet, focused assertiveness.


WHAT ABOUT CRAVINGS & COMPULSIVE/EMOTIONAL EATING FRENZIES: This needs to be addressed in the next blog, but let's get clear about this. If you have not been following the above, you really don't know how much is physiological & how much is emotional. The physiology changes quite quickly & then you can truly meet up with your emotional Self. I told you a bit about mine & I promise that you will not be disappointed when you meet your very own. These are "special" parts of us & while appearing to be negative in nature, that's only from the first glance. You may come to find out that this part of you is the most inventive, creative & helpful in helping yourself to recover.


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Copyrighted 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.HtMay not be reprinted or copied without permission of author.

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is the author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It

Inside the Healing Zone

There are 4 basic steps or active images for Managing Disorderly Eating. Active means that you will be participating "inside" the images. Here we will be building a working or Healing Zone for recovery. In the future, I'll give you additional imagery to add to the basic steps. As your portfolio of imagery grows, your subconscious mind will become more "in love" with your personal recovery & you will begin to notice how it encourages you in new, positive directions.

When dealing with addiction or imbalance of any sort, the mind can benefit from having special structure & this is what these images will provide. And while they give stability, they are fluid & will change throughout your work. I've been working with my Healing Zone for over two decades & while I can easily recognize them in the theater of my mind, once I enter them I'm continually amazed at how my subconscious mind has added to them over the years. It's like having a personal inner coach who is constantly present.

Here are the 4 areas we'll be establishing. Think of them as separate buildings on a particular street. My Healing Center is in a private park, filled with mature trees & lots of flowers. There is a brick paved road & a stone walking path that leads between the buildings. For me, the stone path symbolizes stepping stones & the child part of me loves to skip over them. I share this with you so you can begin to enjoy the beauty of managing your life issues with Interactive Imagery. Keep in mind that your subconscious mind is a "creative child-mind" & becomes very impressed with this type of playful imagery, that is saturated with emotions of joy & pleasure. Then, it will do everything to make it come true for you. Let me mention here that the mind works backwards; once it senses the desired outcome, it will provide the go forward plan to bring it to fruition.

OK...let me take you inside the Healing Zone imagery:

1. Restaurant

2. Bank

3. Exercise Center

4. Film Studio

RESTAURANT

Obviously, eating the right foods, in the right amounts & at the right time are paramount to recovery from disorderly eating, as well as any addiction or body-mind imbalance. The image of a restaurant works well for me & many of my patients like this as well. Let me take you through my imagery. Then you can decide if you would like to work with something like this, or choose something else.

As we enter the building, we find ourselves in the lobby where a large painting of myself is hanging on the wall. I'm holding a child, who is also mySelf. This is very metaphoric, indicating that as I care for mySelf, I care for the child within. If I touch my hand in the painting, the image of mySelf awakens & will step down to greet me. Having a positive, loving & respectful relationship with yourSelf is paramount to recovery, as well as building self-esteem. I pay attention to the details of mySelf; of course they are all positive & glowing.

We enter the restaurant & I'm aware that this is a "restaurant of the world." It is filled with people from all over the world; people who are eating wonderful, healthy food. In other words, we are all on the same page. The world is filled with people who are practicing high level health. It is powerful for me to know this because in the life that I observe out of imagery, it is not like this. Yes, I do need a new model & this is perfect. My lonliness subsides.

Because it is a restaurant of the world, it is divided into sectors; breakfast, lunch, dinner & snacks. As I walk around with my painting Self, I notice the healthy foods & amounts that are being enjoyed for all meals. I like to take my time here because in the past, my choices were often narrow & uninteresting. Now this is just the opposite.While I'm viewing these inner images, my subconscious mind is fast at work, making plans & suggestions for what I need to change. These will pop into my mind at a later time as positive suggestions, motivated by a high desire to move out of my rut.

I often stop & chat with the different "visitors" in the restaurant. I ask them direct questions & always get answers. This is another view of the subconscious mind at work. Sometimes I taste things. Involving the senses is a great way to explode your innate creativity. I'm often invited to sit down & join in the conversations. As I become more involved with the socialization & joy of participating in healthy mealtimes, my own mind is once again looking to revamp my old patterns.

I like to visit the chefs from around the world & observe them prepare wonderful recipes that are easy & delicious. In my out of imagery life, I'm often not keen on cooking, having tired of the process many years ago. This negative emotional marinade made it difficult for me to get healthy & so this type of imagery is very powerful in the area of changes that are important to me.

On another occasion I'll take you outside the restaurant to the gardens that include all the body part plants that benefit directly from the restaurant. This area serves as a very important motivator, indicating what happens to our body & mind when we don't provide what is needed.In the next installment, we'll leave the restaurant & walk over to the Bank. There we will utilize imagery for managing thoughts & emotions, thereby building our assets.

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Copyrighted 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht

May not be reproduced without permission of the author.

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is the author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It

WORKING WITH IMAGES - READING VS DOING

Our brains work in different ways. In fact, we have at least 7 types of intelligences. Some of us can image along with reading, while others cannot. Sometimes we sense this difficulty as "distracting" or "uncomfortable." I also have this issue, but have worked to improve this part of my intelligence. I used to notice it when reading or studying sewing patterns, or figuring out how to work the DVD, especially hooking it up & programming it. I promise you that the images I'll be presenting here will be nothing like those!!

So, how do we get past this "distraction." I suggest that you read through the image exercise first. That will put the compulsive part of you at rest. Yes, we all have compulsive parts of our personalities & they are especially present in those of us with disorderly eating or sugar addiction, the reason being both physiological & emotional/behavioral. We have lots of nasty patterns to break.Next, relax deeply in your chair. I've given instructions for that. If necessary, break those instructions into steps; read them one by one or write them down in a numbered list. That will help the mind to "organize" or settle down. Disorderly eaters often have problems with rapid thought disorder or what I call "runaway brain syndrome."

1. Sit up in the chair with your finger tips on your lower abdomen.

2. Invite or feel your breath in this area. Just think it there. The abdomen goes up & down. Remember how a dog breathes when resting. Your mind will do the rest.

3. If & when your mind wanders, bring it back to the breath.

4. Your mind may try to push you around, but you are in charge.

5. Stay with the breath.

6. Feel the chair pulling you down gently, just as if magnets were there.

7. Feel the chair pulling you back gently, just as if magnets were there.

8. Just with your imagination, draw or imagine that a golden egg shape is around you & you are inside of it. Your mind may wander & that is fine. Bring it back to the egg.

9. Feel your fingers moving on your lower abdomen.

10. Practice enjoying the sensation.That is a very simple, but very important exercise.

What you are doing is taking some control over your mind & body. You are slowing your brain waves & body functions, bringing it back to healthy balance. I suggest that you practice this at least 6 times a day, just for a few minutes. This practice is called "fractionation" & is rather like taking out the trash more frequently. We all need this.

FEAR OF RELAXING

If you are not used to relaxing deeply, then the sensation will be new to you. There is no reason to be afraid to relax deeply. Why would there be? The body & mind WANT & NEED this. If you would like to control the depth of the relaxation, pretend that you have an imaginary dial. When you turn it to the left the body relaxes more; to the right, body tension returns. Practice turning the dial in both ways.

WANTING TO GET RID OF MY WEIGHT RIGHT NOW & DON'T WANT TO DO IT THIS WAY

Oh...well unfortunately that's not the way it works. People with disorderly eating issues are usually looking for a miracle or quick fix. Eating issues are not just about food & that is why diet books or programs don't work on their own. People need to go into "recovery" to become aware of the many facets of the addiction or disorderly eating behaviors. They are different for everyone & only by working closely with the mind & body, will it be possible to climb out of the rut & stay out.

We haven't addressed emotions yet, but I did give an exercise for working inside the "rut." This is a key exercise, because only by bringing "light" to the issues or emotions, can one dilute or escape them. Look at your life as a "theatrical production." The rut is a scene....actually a very important scene that has become the focal point for disorderly eating. For some of us, it is a complicated & dark area. Mine was like that & I'm still cleaning & clearing it out. Recovery takes time & it takes work. In the beginning, emotions may try to stop or block the recovery work. Keep in mind that you are not your emotions. For now, image them as little children, wearing tee shirts with their names on the front. Some are negative & others positive. Negative ones hang out in the "rut" & don't want their environment to change. But, you are in charge now. When you came out of the "rut" I gave you my power through another image. Keep the questions coming....this is what recovering is all about.

MP3

The complimentary mp3 program that I have posted on my websites is called Affirmations for Making Changes. You can download the first track or self-hypnosis session there.

Looking Up & Sensing the Dawn

"As in everything else, we begin where we are. If we must begin again & that is a certainty, we begin where we are, for while we may think that we are in the same place, we are not. We have always progressed, even though we may think differently & this is important to know". .. Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht

By way of my words, I'm inviting you to join me on my journey through what I call "disorderly eating." Some of you may need to lose weight & perhaps a large amount of weight, but it's not always about weight. Through my life & professional career, I've met thousands of individuals who have very nasty eating habits & these habits are taking them down the path to the killer diseases. I share this with you because those of us who have obvious weight issues often envy our slender friends, thinking that they can get away with eating whatever they want & whenever they want. This simply isn't true.

I was motivated to put together this FB adventure when I joined Ruby Gettinger's Wall & noticed how many people were out there cheering her on. As a therapist & author, I wondered who all these people were & how many had issues similar to Ruby's. I wondered how many of those cheering were what I call the "window shoppers of the world"; watching someone else march the path to success while they sit on the sidelines procrastinating, wishing they could do the same, but fearful of stepping out. Window shoppers spend their life looking, wanting & wishing, but never taking the action of entering the shop at hand. I know this well, for I spent a good portion of my own life simply window shopping.

For those of you who are not familiar with my work, I'm an RN Educator & Medical Hypnotherapist. Medical hypnotherapy has been utilized in the practice of medicine for thousands of years. This is not the same as "stage hypnosis." In actual fact, we all practice hypnosis all day long. We do this through our thoughts....mind pictures that are marinated by emotions. Sometimes we get lost in our thoughts & lose track of time & reality. This is called altered consciousness or auto-pilot.

In the practice of medical hypnotherapy, we learn to "wake-up" or become aware of these self-hypnotic states & then choose what we might like to do with our powerful minds. There are so many things for you to know regarding how your mind works. I'm sure you have heard of the mindbody connection. Research is more than clear that mind-produced stress effects the body. 60-90% of disease states are stress related. Perhaps you also know that weight gain is related to stress. What we are talking about are actual "stress chemicals" that are produced inside the body by playing certain negative-based thoughts in the mind. So, what you think can cause illness & also store fat. Not exactly what we have in mind. If this isn't bad enough, the mind works as a "servo-mechanism." That means that the mind is like radar. What you think is not only what you get, but the subconscious mind will accept your thoughts as your "goal of choice" & so you will actually get MORE of it. This is great if your thoughts are reflecting what you truly want, but if they are not, then you get the picture.

This being the case, it's paramount to learn how to wake up & then how to change or manipulate the mind programs or thoughts. This may seem next to impossible, but throw that idea out. Remember what I just told you? Just reading the phrase " next to impossible " is an example of a negative mind program & in this case, guess what you'll be receiving? OK...you get it.

So...how do I go about helping my clients/students? The very same way I go about helping myself, for indeed, I have always been a disorderly eater & I continue to be in recovery. In the quote on the top of the page, I mention about "beginning" & then "beginning again." It's rather like riding a bicycle; we pedal for awhile & then perhaps hit a pebble that breaks our rhythm or maybe a rock appears & we fall off. Obviously we are not going to abandon our bike, but instead we'll attend to our situation or injury & then get back on.

In the practice of self-hypnosis, we work with mind images or inner pictures, also called "metaphors." You might wonder IF you are going to be able to do this & of course, you are because there isn't one person reading this who isn't making images of one sort of another in their mind. You are already working with me & that's exactly right.I'm going to design many, many working images for you to utilize. While it is enough to be reading them, I'd like to suggest that you work with a journal or notebook that you put aside especially for this work. Let me explain why. The subconscious mind is very sensitive about what you truly want & does want to provide it for you. If you dedicate a special notebook & work inside the images as I'm going to suggest, your journey will not only be faster, but much more enjoyable. If you have never worked on getting to know your innerSELF, you are in for a treat....even if you think that you don't like yourself very much. Once again, notice the "mind program." Oh oh... nix that one.

ABOUT RELAXING & INTRODUCING THE GOLDEN EGG & MIND SCREEN

When we work with imagery or our imagination, it's best to take a moment to deeply relax. If you can do that now, great; if not, read through & then decide WHEN you will do this. You might need to make a WRITTEN APPOINTMENT to do this work for yourself. If not, you may end up just "window shopping" & we have already been there. It's easy to deeply relax. Sit up in the chair & place your finger tips on your lower belly...invite your breath to enter your belly, just as if it harbored a balloon of any color you like. Sense the balloon going gently up & then down. Take your time. If you sense yourself rushing OR if your mind is suggesting that you rush, hurry up or any other "demand", simply return to your belly breath. Your mind is NOT in charge.

The Higher Part of you is in charge from now on forward. Enjoy that thought. Now sense the chair gently pulling your down, as if there were magnets pulling you down. Enjoy that. And next, sense the back of the chair pulling you back. Enjoy that. Now, just with your mind, draw a big golden egg shape around you. You are in the egg shape & everything else is outside. Good....you are ready now to simply tilt your eyes up gently & locate your mind screen. This is where YOU will place what you want. YOU are in charge from inside the golden egg shape. BTW, your eyes can be opened or closed. You will be utilizing this exercise from now on forward & sometimes you will be doing it "in the moment" & so your eyes will be opened. Other times they might be closed. OK?

LOOKING UP

I'm going to introduce you to a useful image & give you some suggestions for working inside of it. Most of us live in a rut & sometimes the rut is very, very deep....it might even take on the image of a deep hole. Yes, this could be diagnosed as depression & the work we are doing here does not take the place of professional intervention, so make sure that you are taking care of that if necessary. It's possible to become very attached to living in the hole; in fact, we often decorate it with negative mind images that we play over & over again, perhaps even getting some sick enjoyment from them. If you have these, you know what I mean. Some of mine have included feeling sorry for myself, seeing & sensing myself as a failure, especially in my addictive life, feeling unattractive & not good enough. In other words, my hole was decorated in "victim decor."

I'd like you to think about your rut or hole & notice the decor, as well as the emotions you might feel while being down there. Is it comfortable? Have you settled in? Have you looked UP recently, or located the ladder for climbing OUT? How do you feel about CLIMBING OUT?

Know that your feelings are real & need to be honored & addressed. This will be for another "note"... For now, I'd like to suggest that you find out all you can about your hole & locate the ladder & look up. You will see or sense an image of me. I'm in the light of day or "dawning light" & I'm extending my hand to you. Of course, I'm smiling one of my peaceful, knowing smiles & transferring this welcoming energy to you. Sense that... We are now placing subconscious mind programs & these can be utilized over & over.

As you climb up the ladder sense your determination & power. Next, sense my hand taking yours. I'm transferring my power to you, for that is my work as your "special coach." As you reach the top, step out & notice me. Now, I'm inviting you to go behind me & hold me by the waist. Now, step into me. You may need to make a height adjustment, but go ahead & become comfortable. The purpose of this image is to transmute or change you into your own "inner coach." It is from this position that you will go forward on your path towards high level health & performance & all the aspects of both. WELL DONE!

In the next "note" we'll begin to explore your Goal-den Path & the working metaphors for enhancing your life. I invite you to share your thoughts & experiences with me & other readers of this project. I am certainly willing to protect your privacy if requested.

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Copyright 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht

May not be reproduced without permission of the author

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It

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