Join Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht, author of "Beyond Disorderly Eating: The Truth About Sugar & Bingeing & How to Stop It", as she shares her professional & personal experiences in helping the millions of individuals who are eating & drinking themselves sick.
Friday, July 24, 2009
Emotional Wrestling
Managing emotions is key to high level health in performance. In this book we have already touched on some ways to do this & here I'll introduce some others. Remember that emotions are like kids wearing teeshirts with their names on the front. They come in different degrees or sizes & carry thought DVD's in their backpacks. If you aren't familiar with my work, I refer you to the link below. This is a good place to catch up. So, when thoughts are delivered to the mind, they are chemically coded, meaning that the thoughts change the body physiology. Here we are working with specialized imagery, allowing us to work within the mindBody connection. This type of "in the moment" self-hypnosis practice is very useful, because you can change both emotional & physical outcomes in a split second. You have already heard me talk about the Therapeutic or Mature Self & you know how to shift to that mind-state, thereby disassociating yourSelf from the immature childSelf. Now let's take this one step further...
In the last chapter we spent time addressing the other occupants that share your life with you, be they people you know or don't know. We talked about some negative aspects of others, including tripping you up as you work within your personal Recovery. No matter where you go, you will meet up with the other occupants & you will experience their emotional states. Sometimes, the emotional communication is so subtle that you don't even notice, but it is there. Perhaps you go to the supermarket, check out & walk to your car, perhaps interacting with five or ten people without being aware. Other times you may go to the supermarket & do some head-banging with those who share your life path. And then, you may go back to the supermarket & meet up with someone who delights you in some way, even though you never met that person before & probably will never see them again in your lifetime.
Every individual, or life occupant, has a Therapeutic or mature Self, a Higher Self & a huge selection of childSelves....just like you. I think it helps to know that everyone is put together in the same way. Even those occupants who are locked up in the local jail have the very same configuration. In some of us, the balance is very tilted & the particular tilt brings it's own built-in consequences. Here the focus will be on your emotional childSelves & their interaction with the childSelves of others, for indeed, that is what it is all about. The therapeutic or mature Selves of all occupants tend to work very smoothly, but it's all about those emotional kids & their issues. They are the "emotional wrestlers."
I'll be sharing some working techniques with you in just a moment, but first...
A NOTE TO NEW READERS:
This experiential blog/workshop is based on my new book, "How Many Cookies Will It Take to Make Me Happy?" If you are new to my writing, you might want to read the earlier mini-chapters. They are available on FaceBook, The PublishersMarketPlace & at the following link. Remember to scan down to find the earliest chapters & work your way up. http://beyonddisorderlyeating.blogspot.com/
A bit of background.... we are working with creative Interactive Self-Hypnosis imagery, planting suggestions directly into the creative subconscious mind as you read along. What appears like a story is a series of self-hypnotic sessions, designed to bring about desired lifestyle changes. The inner mind is creative & rather child-like, loving to play with images, especially when they are emotionalized. Just like the saying, "a picture is worth a thousand words", well-planted mind images, can be worth hours of therapy. We can actually change or motivate in 1/200th of a second. So come along & look forward to some lifestyle-changing events.
EMOTIONAL WRESTLING - LOCK HOLDS & OTHER MANIPULATIONS
We all start from where we are. When I started working on my own emotional management, all of this was very new to me. Of course, being an RN, I did understand the emotional component to disease, but at that time I didn't have any techniques to help me change my very strong reactive behaviors, many of which I still have. But now because I actively practice heightened awareness & interactive self-hypnosis "in the moment" I recognize them early on & can adjust them to meet my new criteria of living.
I utilize the image of detachment all the time. In other words, the childSelf is outside of my Therapeutic or mature self. Sometimes the child is in balance, other times not. It helps to be able to identify the emotion that is causing the imbalance. In the book I go over the many different emotional coats or marinades. It's interesting to note that the same ones tend to appear over & over, even though they may be slightly different. Mine tend towards impatience, intolerance, ego-driven need to be perfect, annoyance, especially with those who are slow & then the good old guilt & shame. I also harbor some complicated fear emotional coats, some specific & others resembling general anxiety. As we learn to be aware, we can also locate or see the triggers for these emotional coats. That's why I love the practice of heightened awareness coupled with interactive self-hypnosis. The scenes are so complete. I can actually walk inside what's playing in my current moment & my subconscious mind will show me other pertinent details. Sometimes it's pretty & sometimes it's not, but remember, you cannot change what you cannot or are not willing to see. As you come to practice these awareness exercises, you may find the childSelf wanting to wrestle, but when you stay detached, or in your golden egg, the child's power diminishes very easily, especially with a bit of practice.
In the next blog, I'll address the emotional kid's of the other occupants & how to discipline your own childSelf in these moments. Then, you'll get to see how you can effect change in others without saying a word.
Copyright 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
May not be copied or reproduced without permission of the author.
Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It. She is also the writer/producer of over 350 mp3/CD programs in the areas of medicine, health, prevention, addictions, self-development & sports for adults & children.
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