Monday, May 25, 2009

Difficult Child Self

Thought we were through with the Compulsive Crazies? Not so fast. There are plenty more hanging out in the wings of the theater. We've been looking around the workplace, but I'd like to touch on some very special personal childSelves that many of you will recognize. All of these Selves & more can be found in my new book, "How Many Cookies Will It Take to Make Me Happy?" If you are new to my writing, you might want to read the earlier mini-chapters. They are available on FaceBook, The PublishersMarketPlace & at the following link. Remember to scan down to find the earliest chapters & work your way up.


A bit of background.... we are working with creative Interactive Self-Hypnosis imagery, planting suggestions directly into the creative subconscious mind as you read along. What appears like a story is a series of self-hypnotic sessions, designed to bring about desired lifestyle changes. The inner mind is creative & rather child-like, loving to play with images, especially when they are emotionalized. Just like the saying, "a picture is worth a thousand words", well-planted mind images, can be worth hours of therapy. We can actually change or motivate in 1/200th of a second. So come along & look forward to some lifestyle-changing events.



We've all had the pleasure to screaming, manipulative, out of control children one time or another. The supermarket is a breeding ground for them, but one doesn't even need to leave the house to experience a good dose of what they have to offer. We all have a sizable group of them hanging out in our very own thought processes. I've introduced you to several in this workshop/blog & we are about to meet up with some other ones you might recognize.

Difficult Child-Selves are triggered by the presence of other emotions & the environment. Some triggers are on auto-pilot. For example, when I go food shopping, I often have compulsive thoughts regarding the purchase of ice cream & bakery goods. I rarely have compulsive thoughts at the fish or meat counters. And, I know I'm not alone. The next time you're in the bakery, observe the behaviors of those around you. It's almost as if just breathing in the sugar sets off some sort of hyper-reactionary behavior. People tend to be impatient, pushy & determined to secure that last brownie. When driving home from work, I often hear the inner screams to stop at the pizza place. That child-Self of mine is so completely obnoxious that I used to stop the car at the side of the road to bring "her" back into balance.

Some of the images I'm presenting may seem a bit "over the top", but for those who know what I'm discussing here....this is not "over the top." Difficult emotional childSelves drive people crazy, keep them on the path to the disease door & take away their right to experience high level health & performance. Difficult childSelves lower self-image & self-esteem & can even destroy relationships. Imagine fighting with someone all day long & then going home to be with family or friends. What kind of energy can one bring to the experience? In addition, when the difficult childSelf is not disciplined, no leadership or parenting the Self, nor to others. It is simply not possible to teach others, especially children, if one is out of balance, living under the power of the difficult-child.


It doesn't work to ignore or punish child-Self outbursts, yet this is what most of us do. The child can only be put off for so long & can often be heard screaming in the background. Sounds like a real child? Well, yes it is. Keep in mind that more than likely the child has been allowed to get away with all sorts of obnoxious behaviors & each time a behavior has gone undisciplined, it becomes more firmly etched in the subconscious mind. Each time this particular behavior is triggered, it comes to consciousness wearing a stronger coat. Returning to my pizza ordeal, I was guilty of not managing this particular child of mine for several decades. Can you image "her" powerful coat??

Now you might wonder, if a particular child is so powerful, what chance does one have to return to power & balance? If you have asked this question, perhaps you need to go back & review some of the earlier chapters or blogs. Remember, you are the writer, director & producer of your life. You're in charge. You are the leader, not the child. It really doesn't matter how big or how powerful the child's coat has become. Once you take control of your life, then you run the show, not the child. This is accomplished by commiting fully to self-responsibility, then leading & self-parenting with a calm, assertive manner. If this doesn't come naturally to you, then you need to "pretend" that you have these already present.


Go back to the Theater of the Mind & take your seat as "Director." You know the routine. Direct the curtain to open & call in your actorSelf. Position your Therapeutic Self over there. That's right. Now, empty the stage of all emotions, both helpful & not helpful. Have your actorSelf stand alone. Pay attention to the details. Direct the actorSelf to stand taller, present confidence & power. Observe this. Direct the script....spoken words & thoughts. Listen to the power of speech & make any changes. You already know exactly what is needed here. And...when you have completed this, ask your actorSelf to leave the stage & then re-enter, presenting the newly programmed Self. Observe carefully & make any further changes you deem important.

Copyright 2009 Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht
May not be copied or reproduced without permission of the author.

Elizabeth Bohorquez, RN, C.Ht is author of Sugar...the Hidden Eating Disorder & How to Lick It. She is also the writer/producer of over 350 mp3/CD programs in the areas of medicine, health, prevention, addictions, self-development & sports for adults & children.