Friday, December 17, 2010

Affirmation Workshop - Opening Stressors

For those of you who are following along, please go and relax deeply into the moment. You already know how to do this. If you are new to my writing, scroll down for some further instructions. Once you are deeply relaxed, return to your "workshop" and pick up your "Book of Stressors." Notice how heavy it is. Also notice that it has a beautiful leather cover with your name embossed on the cover. Trace your name with your finger. You are you. This is your book. It is heavy. It is filled with value.

Your subconscious mind directs you to look at the table of contents. Here you find your stressors divided into different categories. This makes it easier for identification purposes. The more stressors or "buttons" you find, the better for you. Not only can you release the body from the production of stress chemicals caused by these, but you can also diminish the compulsion or obsession connected to the stressors. That's the part of you that actually calls the stressor to return for another performance. "Let's get mad, sad, out of control, play victim and a host of other roles you do so well."

Stress reactions are made by choice. Nothing is stressful on it's own. In addition, most stressors are pure mind fantasy....stories we have sold ourselves and then share with others. We each decide what we will be bothered, annoyed or frightened about, as well as the level that we choose to be effected. Each time we tell the story, either to ourselves or to someone else, the stressor button becomes more golden...more valuable in a negative sense.

So, now you know why it is so important to locate these. As you look at your "table of contents" many will jump into your mind. We have stress buttons in relation to specific people and experiences. Then, there are those more generalized. Think about things you don't like to do or particular behaviors you don't like in general. Tell yourself "all of the things you don't like, in other words, your life complaints." Be sure to look in the area having to do with yourself. These are often the most toxic. The things you don't like about yourself usually have huge stress buttons.

Some stressors will be hidden, often forced into hiding by toxic emotions, especially anger and fear. You may even hear yourself denying having a stressor or even stress in general. "I don't know why I binge at night. I have no stress in my life. My stress has nothing to do with my eating issues. I exercise. I meditate. I'm happily married, have perfect children and even my dog is a pure delight." The need to be right, being judgmental about yourself and others cause great stress to build in the mind and body. And, stress needs to be released. The body and mind need balance....this is called homeostasis.

Now, look to your stress-release mechanisms. These are usually addictive. Be sure to look beyond substances such as caffeine, food, sugars, beverages, alcohol, smoking and the usual ones. Look way beyond those....see if you can find addictive behaviors or emotions. Look beyond the usual behaviors that are more on the surface. Go down deep. They are often the most difficult to find and then to own. Any secrets? Dig them out and bring them to the light. They won't hurt you. Secrets cause pain when they are hidden, but not when they are opened to the light. Forgiveness and compassion comes with this lighting.

In the moment you become aware of the stressor, you can release it with your breath. The combination of awareness and breath will not only diminish the stressor, but will "open" it. Inside the stressor are "golden opportunities". They are buried deep inside, but will show themselves if you are diligent about staying aware and releasing.
Here's the action steps...


You may be wondering, "What are golden opportunities?" These can be all sorts of treasures. Some things I've found inside my own stressors are keys to the triggers. Now that I have the keys, the triggers no longer work. I've also found great insight about myself and the origin of the stressors. Some were given to me "as gifts" from people I wanted to please and so I learned to imitate them. Others were things that people "sold" to me as good, or even great ideas, such as bingeing or hiding or lying. These are powerful awareness tools. I remember finding plans for stopping a particular stress reaction, one that could also be applied to other things.

So, be diligent! Get the job done! Have fun! Be grateful!

Monday, December 13, 2010

Shining the Awareness Flashlight


The mind screen is one of our most powerful resources for it allows us to view what's going on in our moment to moment life without "being in it." We are the observers and not the participants. Certainly, one could argue, that we are doing whatever it is, but when we take the position of "observer", we hold the power for change. It's like being the writer/producer/director of a movie or play. The "director you" sits in the audience seats observing the scene on the stage. For that position it's easy to see the big picture and to make the changes that will make the production better. This is exactly what you are doing.

A powerful image in the awareness flashlight. It works in the same way as the theater in the mind. When you hold the light and point it at something, you are also the "observer." The name of the game is to bring everything to the light. Some aspects need greater introspection. For example, if you find yourself in the supermarket placing cookies or ice cream in your cart, you want to shine that flashlight on that scene. The observer wants to ask some very pertinent questions. "What's going on here? What were you thinking? What was the motivation? What emotions are present? How hot are those emotions? Who is in charge? Now...a very important question. What were you NOT thinking? What is missing from this scene?"

So, your actions are not just simple little meaningless things. Without stopping the action with the flashlight, you miss out on the most important information and it is this information that will bring you to a higher level of self-management.

Every moment holds the opportunity for getting better and better. I used to ask myself, "How well can I do my supermarket experience?" Another question, "What will my shopping cart look like when I get to the check-out? Will I need to make any corrections before I empty my cart? If so, how did those things get in my cart? What was happening in those moments?" Here's another opportunity to take out the flashlight. In other words, it's not over until it's over.

It's both interesting and powerful to pay attention to the workings of your mind. Look and listen. Your inner chat and mind images are your teachers. They show you your truth and then, give you the opportunity to "ask for the answers."

Let's go back to my supermarket experience and the questions I asked myself regarding the cookies and ice cream. That particular day my emotions were running "very hot." My emotional child was completely out of control, not wanting, but demanding a reward. The inner dialog went something like this. "You never give me anything. I work very hard and I deserve this. I want it. I want it. I want it. Give it to me. No? Well I'm taking it."

On this particular day I found myself with a pint of Haagen-Daz in each hand. My emotional childSelf relaxed. Then, I became aware of what had gone on. As I shined the flashlight, my emotional self tightened up. It was difficult to move my body and my hands refused to open so I could release the two containers of ice cream. Another woman was standing behind me, "Take as long as you like, " she smiled. "It's so difficult to make a choice." OH....yes, how right she was, but I made a choice right in that moment. I put the ice cream back on the shelf and took my screaming childSelf to the car. I moved the seat back and began to meditate. I needed to get to a place where I could ask the right questions because this was a very big teaching moment.

As I went deeper down into the place where my very best flashlight is located, I noticed an image of my emotional childSelf waiting for me. She was wearing a very big wristwatch. I asked her to show it to me, then asked her why she was wearing it. "It's the hurry up watch. The hurry-hurry-hurry-hurry watch."

Identifying stressors is not always what it seems on the surface. Some are buried very deeply, others are multiplied making them appear "normal", but they are not. The hurry-hurry watch is one of these. If you keep an eye out for people zooming around life, you don't have to look far for those wearing this time-piece.

Relax now...go to the Workshop of Your Mind...pick up the book called "stressors" & ask your subconscious to show you what's going on. Throughout your day your thoughts will register the answers to this question, so stay alert.

copyright 2010 Elizabeth Bohorquez RN, C.Ht
May not be reproduced without permission of author.